1. |
Negatory
01:52
|
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wanted to be awesome
now I want to sleep all day
wanted to be useful
now I lay around ashamed
wanted to be graceful
never to be down
wanted to be tasteful
someone you could be around
wanted to be awesome
wanted to be good at heart
wanted to be famous
wanted to be taking part
never to be fawning
only to be nice
working at a calling
doing something with my life
but, no.
wanted to be healthy
but I just want to sleep all day
oh, but I’m trying!
but there’s a world when I’m awake!
wanted to be helpful
not to be ignored
wanted to be happy
wanted to be moving forward
but, no.
|
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2. |
Bingewatching
02:25
|
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I guess that it’s a regret
that we ever met at all
sore lips and requests sent
while the band played down the hall
cue weeks of unread texts
when I know you had your phone
pointless to stay, pointless to go
I met you out in your car
while you stayed on the clock
I tried to flirt with you
but then just got you off
and when I asked when you were free
you said you didn’t know
pointless to stay, pointless to go
Netflix and cigarettes
another night at home
blanket up to my chest
waiting for you to call
four walls, then empty world
the good life passed me by
but the pillow I stole from your room will pass for you tonight
the pillow I stole from your room will pass for you tonight
the pillow I stole from your room will pass for you tonight
the pillow I stole from your room will pass for you tonight
the pillow I stole from your room will pass for you tonight
|
||||
3. |
Big Lie
01:49
|
|||
oh, the life I wanted didn’t work out well
a nice apartment where I go to hide
oh, unstable to be sure!
but, oh, the lies that I would feed to her
to make it work
big lie
of an impossible life
where sickness and sadness slip away
big lie
oh but it’s mine for tonight
a secret to keep myself at bay
for one more day
but now it’s my head
now it feels like more than I can do to stay in bed
and oh god every promise pressed
more mistakes onto my chest
and now there’s nothing I can do
because I can barely move
but I remember loving you
when everything was building to a
big lie
of an impossible life
where sickness and sadness slip away
big lie
oh but it’s mine for tonight
a secret that sleeping could escape
for one more day
|
||||
4. |
They're Playing Our Song
02:57
|
|||
how am I breathing tonight
how am I keeping the pace in my heart
the sensitive part
of the body
that you are
completely degrading?
and, is this how criminals come?
out of the night with bouquets in their arms
and charisma and charm
until all of
their victims are
practically begging?
I don’t think I wanted to dance
but I will remember the name of the song
and I’ll hum along
fighting to withstand the flood of emotion
but, god it is so hard
when they play it in every bar
“oh, pour me a new one,”
I’ll say
oh god what am I gonna do?
scour my skin off to get rid of you?
send out a search team
to every party
that I want to go to?
I just want so badly to scream
how did we get from you flirting with me
for a dance
and a drink
into a nightmare I won’t be forgetting?
I don’t think I wanted to dance
but I will remember the name of the song
and I’ll hum along
fighting to withstand the flood of emotion
and god it is so hard
when they play it in every bar
“oh, pour me a new one,”
I’ll say
|
||||
5. |
Drawn To Monsters
03:29
|
|||
wake up weeping with my phone still in my face
does the light from the window mean morning has come,
or did I sleep all day?
one more thumb through your photos
then call your machine to listen to your voice
and then I wade through your trash from a couple weeks back
and there is nothing not yours
no, there is nothing not yours
and there is nothing of me
but my hands on your pillow
when you stay out all night
oh, but I fell for it so hard
oh, my sensitive psycho!
I liked what you said, and I wanted you then,
but now I don’t, I don’t - I don’t know
still, I cling to my curtains,
hide in my bedroom,
and send a million messages:
“i swear whatever I did I know I can fix it”
because there is nothing not yours
no, there is nothing not yours
and there is nothing of me
but my hands on your pillow
when you stay out all night
|
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6. |
Stupid
02:16
|
|||
I feel you look like that.
what is the difference between
who you are and where I’m at?
embrace: both hands cold,
I
feel the distance between our kissing coats,
and I know why.
I ask, you don’t reply.
why bother talking when we both know
that he’s outside?
smile, laugh,
start waving back.
watching you kiss him through my new window
while I unpack.
embellish my appointments
embellish my CV
exaggerate my interest in anyone still left here
dumb enough to be nice to me
what are they, stupid?
|
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